Steps in Decision Making
You have a decision to make. In fact, time is running out and you must make a decision.
The problem is that you are terrified you will make a mistake.
The more I work with people the more I notice that most doubt themselves. It doesn't matter how much they know, they don't trust the decisions they make.
Of the last 50 decisions they've made, they focus on the one or two which had negative repercussions.
They then believe they must depend upon someone else, including their therapist, to give them the answers to life’s questions. They trust everyone’s opinion but their own.
We all need people who will hear us and give us their opinion. Someone else can assist in clarifying our thoughts and give us a different perspective.
We must always remember that, no matter how much wisdom another may have, we still need to make our own decisions based upon our own inner wisdom.
We often doubt we have inner wisdom because of the repeated mistakes in our lives. We forget we all have a deep well of inner wisdom. Most of us have never learned to tap into that well.
I want to share with you some ways to tap into your inner wisdom to make decisions.
Get a sense of what you want. What is your ultimate goal?
Why are you reluctant about making decisions? What happened in your life that resulted in you mistrusting yourself.
What has been your past experience with decisions? Were the repercussions negative, positive or neutral? How many of each?
If you believe you always make wrong decisions, what are the experiences which back up your belief.
Gather needed information. That may mean reading articles and books or talking to various people.
Who are the best people in your life to discuss certain issues? Some people are great for discussing relationships, others financial and still others for decorating.
You may need to consult someone new for a new perspective on things.
Now that you have information, go into your heart and “weigh” the decision. The “weight” is the amount of peace you have when you bring the various options to mind while focusing on your heart.
Finally, go with the option that gives you the most peace. If more than one option gives peace, choose the one you like the best!
There are times decisions are demanded in a short period of time. Go into your heart, do a quick review of similar decisions, weigh the options in your heart and make your decision. Listen to that quiet voice within you that sends out an affirmation or a warning.
What does it mean if we thought we made the best decision and it turned out all wrong?
“Turned out wrong” usually means there was pain and discord as a result of the decision. Perhaps it didn’t “turn out wrong.” You learned exactly what you were supposed to learn. Find the lesson in what happened and discover what could be done differently next time.
by Cathy Chapman, PhD -
